These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations.

Sign on an asphalt truck: “Let us fill your crack!”

Office sign: “Ace exterminating – we kill bugs dead, walk-ins welcome.”

Sign at a muffler shop: “No muff too tough for us!”

Sign on a government issue car: “Fulton county disaster coordinator.”

Sign in a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notice.

Sign seen on an electricity pylon: DANGER! “To touch these wires will result in instant death. Anyone found doing so will be severely prosecuted.”

Sign in a Japanese Hotel room: In another Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub.

Sign in a Leipzig elevator: “Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.”