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Traditions Jokes


10. Neighbors describing him as “a quiet loner.”

9. Removed from a department store last December after screaming at Santa, “You’re going to die up there, fat man!”

8. Can’t stop washing his paws.

7. Colorful eggs now filled with Prozac.

6. Apartment walls covered with photos of Sharon Stone.

5. Met with Dr. Kevorkian about the possibility of a “suicide egg.”

4. Rotting corpse of Energizer bunny recently discovered in his crawl space.

3. Won’t come out of his compound in Waco, Texas.

2. He’s hippity-hopped up on crack.

1. Keeps rubbing himself for good luck.

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Knock,knock.

Who’s there?

Ether

Ether who?

Ether bunny.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Juan

Juan who?

Juan more ether bunny.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Stella

Stella who?

Stella nother ether bunny.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Justin

Justin who?

Justin other Ether Bunny.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Samoa

Samoa who?

Samoa Ether Bunnies.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Beryl

Beryl who?

Beryl of ether bunnies.

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Dewey

Dewey who?

Dewey have to listen to any more ether bunny jokes?

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Consumption.

Consumption who?

Consumption be done about all these ether bunnies?

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Cargo

Cargo who?

Cargo “beep, beep”…run over all the ether bunnies.

Knock, Knock.

Who’s there?

Boo.

Boo who?

Don’t cry–all the Ether bunnies will be back again next year!”

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Q. Why did the Easter Bunny hide the egg?

A. Because it was a little chicken.

Q. What does the Easter Rabbit get for making a basket?

A. Two points just like everybody!

Q. What do you call a rabbit with fleas?

A. Bugs Bunny

Q. What do you call a dumb bunny?A. A hare brain.

Q. What’s the best way to catch a unique rabbit?

A. You ‘nique up on him.

Q. How do you catch a tame rabbit?

A. Tame way, unique up on it.

Q. How many hairs in a rabbit’s tail?

A. None, they’re all on the outside.

Q. What do you call a line of rabbits walking backwards?A. A receding hareline.

Q. How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?

A. Have you ever seen a rabbit with glasses?

Q. What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a boyscout?

A. A boyscout who helps little old ladies hop across the street.

Q. What do you get when you cross a rabbit with an elephant?

A. An elephant who never forgets to eat his carrots.

Q. How are rabbits like calculators?

A. They both multiply really fast.

Q. Why can’t a rabbit’s nose be twelve inches long?

A. Because then it would be a foot.

Q. How can you tell which rabbits are the oldest in a group?

A. Just look for the gray hares.

Q. How do you know when you’re eating rabbit stew?

A. When it has hares in it.

Q. What do you call a rabbit who tells jokes?

A. A funny bunny.

Q. What do you call rabbits that live at the North Pole?

A. Cold.

Q. What do rabbits have that nothing else in the world has?

A. Baby rabbits.

Q. What is a rabbit’s favorite dance?

A. The Bunny Hop of course.

Q. Waitress, what’s this hare doing in my soup?A. Looks like the back stroke.

Q. How do bunnies stay healthy?

A. Eggercise

Q. What do you cal a bunny with a dictionary in his pants?

A. A smarty pants.

Q. What would you call the Easter Bunny if he married a chicken?

A. The first Rabbit to lay and egg.

Q. What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole?

A. A Hot Cross bunny.

Q. What do you get when you cross a bunny with a spider?

A. A harenet.

Q. What did the bunny say when he only had thistles to eat?

A. Thistle have to do!

Q. Why is a bunny the luckiest animal in the world?

A. It has 4 rabbits’ feet.

Q. How do you get letter to a bunny?

A. Hare mail.

Q. What is the difference between a crazy bunny and a counterfeit banknote?

A. One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny!

Q. What do you get when you cross a bunny with an onion?

A. A bunion.

Q. What does a bunny use when it goes fishing?

A. A harenet.

Q. What did the bunny want to do when he grew up?

A. Join the Hare Force.

Q. What goes ha-ha-clunk?

A. A bunny laughing its head off.

Q. How do you make a rabbit stew?

A. Make it wait for 3 hours!

Q. Where does a bunny go when it dies?

A. To the hare-after.

Q: Why are people always tired in April?

A: Because they just finished a march

Q: What do you call a very smart bunny?

A: An egghead.

Q: What do you call the Easter Bunny the Monday after Easter?

A: Tired.

Q: What did the rabbit say to the carrot?

A: It’s been nice gnawing you.

Q: Why did a fellow rabbit say that the Easter Bunny was self-centered?

A: Because he is eggocentric. (egocentric)

Q: Where does Valentine’s Day comes after Easter?

A: In the dictionary.

Q: Do you know how bunnies stay in shape?

A: Hareobics.

Q: What’s the difference between a bunny and a lumberjack?

A: One chews and hops, the other hews and chops.

Q: How does the Easter Bunny say Happy Easter?

A: Hoppy Easter!

Q: Why did the magician have to cancel his show?

A: He’d just washed his hare and couldn’t do a thing with it.

Q. Why does the easter bunny have such a shiny nose?

A. His powder puff’s on the wrong end.

Q. What do you call it when a rabbit has an accident with a knife?

A. A hare cut.

Q. Why do rabbits do so well at school?

A. They’re experts at multiplication.

Q. What came first, the chicken or the egg?

A. Neither–the Easter Bunny!

Q. Where do Easter Bunnies go for new tails?

A. To the retail store.

Q. Do you know how to find the Easter bunny if he was lost?

A. Make a noise like a carrot; he’ll find you.

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10. Big tax write-off.

9. Who ever heard of Easter Bricks?

8. Consider all of the varieties: scrambled, over easy, hard boiled.

7. He gets a good deal from the local chickens.

6. Secret plan to eliminate human race by cholesterol overdose.

5. Pressure from the Egg Marketing Board.

4. Because if it brought bottle rockets it would be the Independence Bunny.

3. Would you want to hunt for waffles?

2. He thinks guys should get chicks at least once a year.

1. Because the Energizer rabbit got the good job.

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1. Hey, I watch television. Every year, he’s there clucking in the Cadbury egg commercials.

2. Who do you think delivers all the baskets and stuff, the little chicks? Doubtful.

3. When I was six, I saw a bunny at the scene of the crime. He put his finger aside his nose, and up the chimney he rose.

4. It was a little cafe somewhere in France, I was young, and yes, I believed everything he told me.

5. Someone is posing for those chocolate rabbit molds, and I think you’re thinking what I’m thinking.

6. Who else has time to color all those eggs? Not me, Jack.

7. Yeah, and Peter Rabbit didn’t think Mr. McGregor was going to catch him in the cabbage patch either — get with the times.

8. I had a pet rabbit in the 4th grade, and he told me it was all true.

9. Once, I put a tooth under my pillow, and in the morning I had a marshmallow Easter egg.

10. Someone has to believe in the Easter bunny.

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