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1. A man comes into the ER and yells, ‘My wife’s going to have her baby in the cab!’ I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady’s dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly, I noticed that there were several cabs — and I was in the wrong one.
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“Staring at women’s breasts is good for men’s health and makes them live longer, a new survey reveals. Researchers have discovered that a 10-minute ogle at women’s breasts is as healthy as half-an-hour in the gym. A five-year study of 200 men found that those who enjoyed a longing look at busty beauties had lower blood pressure, less heart disease and slower pulse rates compared to those who did not get their daily eyeful.
Read More…
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This information came over the internet some years ago. It purports to be the answers given by students in science exams around the world. It came with the comment that “it is truly astonishing what weird science our young scholars can create under the pressure of time and grades?.” I was unable to trace the author, but as the work deserves wider dissemination, I present here the answers of most interest to a medical audience.
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Nine months after struggling to get out; rest of your life you are struggling to get in.
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1. “Have you ever been in therapy? No? You should try it. It’s like a really easy game show where the correct answer to every question is: ‘Because of my mother.’”
Robin Greenspan Read More…
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There was this man from Cape Horn,
He wished he had never been born,
He would not have been,
Had his father seen
That the tip of his Nirodh was torn.
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Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
On the second day, the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely.
She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
Read More…
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A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital,
wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose,
still heavily sedated from a difficult, four hour,
surgical procedure. A young blonde student nurse
appears to give him a partial sponge bath.
“Nurse”, he mumbles, from behind the mask. “Are my
testicles black?”
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, Read More…
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There was this woman who was desperate to meet a companion.
She went to single bars, singles dances etc., but she could never meet anyone who would go on a date with her, much less sleep with her. So in her desperation she went to see a sex doctor, named Dr. Chang.
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A young lesbian goes to her gynecologist for her yearly pelvic examination. She puts on the paper gown and awaits him to come into the exam room. He instructs her to get up onto the table and place her feet in the stirrups.
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An elderly couple went to the doctor’s office. The doctor asked, “What can I do for you?”
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A man approached his family physician and said,
“Doc, I’m afraid you’ll have to remove my wife’s tonsils one of these days.”
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A concerned husband went to the doctor to talk about his wife.
He said to the doctor, “I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time and always asks me to repeat things.”
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A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor’s office.
After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, “Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don’t follow my instructions carefully, your husband will surely die.
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“Doc, I think my son has VD,” a patient told his urologist on the phone. “The only woman he’s screwed is our maid.”
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This guy goes into a doctors and says, “Doctor, doctor you’ve gotta help me. I just can’t stop having sex!”
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Three old men are at the doctor for a memory test. The doctor says to the first old man, “What is three times three?”
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An elderly lady goes into the doctor and tells him – “Doctor, I don’t know what the problem is, but I’ve been farting all the time. It’s not really a problem socially because they don’t make any noise and don’t smell. I just can’t stop farting all the time. In fact while I’ve been in here I must have farted at least 20 times.”
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