These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations.

Sign for a litter of dachshund pups: “Get a `long` little doggie!”

Sign in a cafeteria: “Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria. In pencil beneath the sign: Socks can eat anyplace they want.”

Sign on a music library’s door: “Bach in a minuet.”

Sign in a restaurant window: “T-bone steak $1 Then, in fine print underneath: With meat $12″

A hardware store in Oregon has a sign that reads: “Today’s special. Below it says: So’s tomorrow.”

Sign on restaurant window: “Great food (50,000 flies can’t be wrong).”

Billboard facing the road in front of a funeral home: “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”

Sign in a Maine restaurant: “Open 7 days a week and weekends.”

Sign in school: “In case of atomic attack, the federal ruling concerning prayer in this building will be temporarily suspended.”