Encyclopedia of Humor

Why do seagulls live by the sea?
Because if they lived by the bay, they would be called baygulls!
(baygull-bagel. ha ha ha.)

A motorist pulls up to the gas pumps and says “fill it up, please”. The Attendant notices that the front and back seats of the car are
occupied by penguins.

“Hey Buddy” says the attendant to the driver, “These birds can’t be happy like this…they’re wild animals, you should take them to a zoo
or something..”

The motorist agrees to do so.

The next day the guy drives into the filling station and once more the attendant sees the penquins installed in the front and back seats, and they are all wearing sunglasses and holding towels…

“What’s this?” he says to the driver, “I thought you agreed to take these birds to the zoo?”

The driver says “I did…and they had such a great time that today I’m taking them to the beach.”

A group of bats, hanging at the ceiling of a cave, discovers a single bat
STANDING upright underneath on the floor of the cave.

Surprised by this unusual behavior, they ask this fellow: “What the heck
are you doing down there?”

And the fellow shouts back: “Yoga!”

What do you call a gay dinosaur?

A megasorass.

What did the bird say when his cage fell apart?

Answer: Cheap-Cheap