Encyclopedia of Humor

It is not illegal to speed. (Repealed)

Buckner
In this small town of only 4,000, yard waste may be burned any day except Sunday.

Excelsior Springs
Worrying squirrels is not tolerated.

Hard objects may not be thrown by hand.

Kansas City
Installation of bathtubs with four legs resembling animal paws is prohibited.

Minors are not allowed to purchase cap pistols, however they may buy shotguns freely.

Marceline
Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.

Marquette
It is illegal for more than four unrelated persons to occupy the same dwelling (The Brothel Law).

Mole
Frightening a baby is in violation of the law.

Natchez
It shall be unlawful to provide beer or other intoxicants to elephants.

Purdy
Dancing is strictly prohibited.

St. Louis
It’s illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket. This law refers back to the extinct Italian celebration, Hill Day, when beer was served in buckets.

A milk man may not run while on duty.

University City
Four women may not rent an apartment together.

Sunday, November 29, 1992

Robert A. Chase, 45, was charged with threatening an 11-year-old boy with a knife in Madison, Wis. The boy was watching Chase play basketball with another adult when the opponent accused Chase of “traveling” (taking steps without dribbling the ball).

To seek an impartial opinion, Chase asked the boy, but the boy agreed that Chase had traveled. Chase then allegedly grabbed the boy, held a knife to his throat, and asked, “Now. Did I travel?”

Monday, December 7, 1992

In September, the Smell & Taste Treatment and Research Foundation reported the development of an odor that makes gamblers bet more. In a study in Las Vegas, slot machines outfitted to emit the odor racked up 45 percent more business.

The neurologist who conducted the study predicted that the scent will become widely used in Las Vegas.

Vagrancy is punishable by either 30 days in prison or a $201 fine. -Sec. 97-35-37

Cattle rustling is punishable by hanging.

Horses are not to be housed within 50 feet of any road.

Columbus
The fine for waving a gun in public is higher than actually shooting it.

Oxford
Motor vehicles on the square are prohibited.

It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100 times in a single session.

Horn honking is not permitted as it might scare horses.

One may not spit on the sidewalks on the square.

Tylertown
It is unlawful to shave in the center of main street.

Monday, December 7, 1992

Joe Albert Ruiz, 19, was arrested in Santa Maria in September. Police said he had broken into a car in the middle of the night and was in the trunk, disconnecting the rear speakers, when the trunk closed and locked him in.

Neighbors reported strange noises, and a police officer called to the scene heard Ruiz banging on the trunk and yelling, “Let me out!”