Encyclopedia of Humor

What goes blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette?

A blonde doing cartwheels!

A blonde walks into a barber shop one day and asks the man if she can get her hair cut. The man says “Well ma’am, I can’t cut your hair with those head-phones on. You’re going to have to take them off.”She shakes her head vigorously and replies “No, if I take them off, I will die.” He put his hands on his hips and ripped them off of her head. She fell to the floor and died. He was extremely surprised and picked up the head-phones.

All he heard was “Breathe in, breathe out, breath in.”

How do you make a blonde go crazy? Place them in a round room, and tell them to stand in the corner!

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head where driving down the road, when a cop starts to chase them.

They rush off and crash into the side of a barn, they immediately jump out of the car and hide under potatoe sacks.

The cop runs in after them, and the first potatoe sack he comes to the brunette is under. He kicks it and the brunette says, “MEEEEOOOOOOW”, and the cop says, “Oh! It’s just a stupid cat.”

He then moves to the potatoe sack the red-head is under and kicks it. The red-head replies, “ROOF, ROOF”, the cop, angry now, says, “STUPID DOG!!”

Then the cop gets to the potatoe sack the blonde is under, he kicks it with great force and the blonde creams, “POOOOOOTAAAAAAATOOOOOOOE!

A blonde and a brunette jumped off a bridge, who landed in the water first?

The brunette. The blonde had to stop and ask for directions.