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Kentucky Redneck Jokes

Did you hear about the guy from Kentucky who passed away and left his entire estate in trust for his beloved widow? She can’t touch it till she’s fourteen.

Emily Sue passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911 operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. “Where do you live?” asked the operator.

Bubba replied, “At the end of Eucalyptus Drive.”

The operator asked, “Can you spell that for me?

There was a long pause and finally Bubba said, “How ’bout if I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her up there?”

How do you know when you’re staying in a Kentucky hotel? When you call the front desk and say “I’ve gotta leak in my sink” and the person at the front desk says “go ahead.”

Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age in Kentucky to 32? It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools!

What do they call reruns of “Hee Haw” in Kentucky? A documentary.

Where was the toothbrush invented? Kentucky. If it was invented anywhere else it would have been called a teethbrush.

A Kentucky State trooper pulled over a pickup truck on I40. He said to the driver, “Got any ID?” The driver said, “Bout what?”

Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Kentucky State Lottery? The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.

Did you hear that the governor’s mansion in Kentucky burned down?
Yep. Pert’ near took out the whole trailer park.

A new law recently passed in Kentucky: When a couple gets divorced, they can still brother and sister.

Two Kentuckians were walking down different ends of a street toward each other, and one was carrying a sack. When they met, one said, “Hey, Tommy Ray, what’cha got in th’ bag?”

“Jus’ some chickens.”

“If I guesses how many they are, can I have one?”

“Shoot, ya guesses right and I’ll give you both of them.”

“OK. Ummmmm . . . five?”

What do a divorce in Kentucky, a tornado in Kansas, and a hurricane in Florida have in common? Somebody’s fixin’ to lose them a trailer.

A guy from Kentucky came home and found his house on fire, he rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, “Hurry over here. My house is on fire!”
“OK,” replied the fireman, “how do we get there?”
“Shucks, don’t you still have those big red trucks with lights?”

Why do folks in Kentucky go to the movie theater in groups of 18 or more? ‘Cuz 17 and under not admitted.

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