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Someone who solves a problem, you didn’t know you had, in a way you don’t understand

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Q: What does an accountant do for birth control?
A. He talks about his business

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There are just two types of accountants:
Those who can count and those who can’t.

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Q: Why did the auditor cross the road?
A: Because he looked in the file and that’s what they did last year.

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Q: How do you drive an accountant completely insane?
A: Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him and fold up a road map the wrong way.

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