master card proposal   Top Pick of the Week: Check out this hilarious master card proposal

MOST WANTED:
Valentine`s Day Jokes
Dumb People Jokes
Viral Videos
Santa Jokes
Funny Pictures
Economy Jokes
Relationship Jokes
Funny Lists
Political Jokes
Motivational Posters
Thanksgiving Jokes
Funniest Jokes
Funny eRepublik
Pranks
Photo of the day

AA Main


1…Constipated People Don’t Give A Crap.

2…If You Don’t Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.

3…My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.

4…To All You Virgins, Thanks For Nothing.

5…Impotence: Nature’s Way Of Saying “No Hard Feelings”.

6…I Have The Body Of A God… Buddha

7…Illiterate? Write For Help

8…If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You’re Doing It Wrong

9…Cat: The Other White Meat

10…Heart Attacks…God’s Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends

If you liked this, you might also like: master card proposal

Posted in: Funny Lists No Comments.

8 things you’ll never hear a man say:

8) Here honey, you use the remote.

7) You know, I’d like to see her again, but her breasts are just too big.

6) Ooh, Antonio Banderas AND Brad Pitt? That’s one movie I gotta see!

5) While I’m up, can I get you anything?

4) Sex isn’t that important, sometimes I just want to be held.

3) Aww, forget Monday night football, let’s watch Melrose Place.

2) Hey, let me hold your purse while you try that on.

1) We never talk anymore.

8 things you’ll never hear a woman say :

8) What do you mean today’s our anniversary?

7) Can we not talk to each other tonight? I’d rather just watch TV.

6) Ohh, this diamond is way to big!

5) Can our relationship get a little more physical? I’m tired of being ‘just friends’

4) Honey, does this outfit make my butt look too small?

3) Aww, don’t stop for directions, I’m sure you’ll be able to figure out how to get there.

2) I don’t care if it’s on sale, 300 dollars is way to much for a designer dress.

1) Hey, pull my finger!

If you liked this, you might also like: master card proposal

Posted in: Funny Lists No Comments.

1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION…

“Just wait until your father gets home.”

2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING….

“You are going to get it when we get home!”

3. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE…

“What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you … Don’t talk back to me!”

4. My Mother taught me LOGIC…

“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, your not going to the store with me.”

5. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE…

“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.”

6. My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD…

“If you don’t pass your spelling test, you’ll never get a good job.”

7. My Mother taught me ESP…

“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you’re cold?”

8. My Mother taught me HUMOR…

“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”

9. My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT…

“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”

10. My Mother taught me about SEX….

“How do you think you got here?”

11. My Mother taught me about GENETICS…

“You’re just like your father.”

12. My Mother taught me about my ROOTS…

“Do you think you were born in a barn?”

13. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE…

“When you get to be my age, you will understand.”

14. And my all time favorite… JUSTICE…

“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you… then you’ll see what it’s like”

If you liked this, you might also like: master card proposal

Posted in: Funny Lists No Comments.

10. Your so-called “speed limits” mean nothing to me flatfoot. I live my life one quarter-mile at a time.

9. You again? I thought I lost you at that last red light.

8. Aren’t you going to strip search me, big boy?

7. I am not the droid you’re looking for. You don’t need to see my papers.

6. Darn! My radar detector must be broken again.

5. You better hurry up with that ticket. Dunkin’ Donuts closes in 15 minutes.

4. You’re not going to search my trunk are you?

3. How about you watch my friend Ben Franklin while I get my registration?

2. Sorry I was speeding officer, but your daughter said she had to be home by eleven.

1. Hey Barney! How are things in Mayberry?

If you liked this, you might also like: master card proposal

Posted in: Funny Lists No Comments.

1. Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in.

2. Aren’t you the guy from the Village People?

3. Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

4. Are You Andy or Barney?

5. I thought you had to be in good physical condition to be a police officer.

6. You’re not gonna check the trunk, are you?

7. I pay your salary!

8. Gee, Officer! That’s terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

9. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

10. I was trying to keep up with traffic. I know there are no other cars around. That’s how far ahead of me they are.

11. When the Officer says “Gee Son….Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?” You probably shouldn’t respond with, “Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?”

If you liked this, you might also like: master card proposal

Posted in: Funny Lists No Comments.