Encyclopedia of Humor

What do you call a closet full of lesbians?

A liquor cabinet.

Q. What does a sign on a whorehouse say in the middle of the day?
A. Beat it – we’re closed.

Safe Sex Saves Souls So Screw Someone Special Soon

A man who just got a raise decides to buy a new scope for his rifle. He goes to a rifle shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope. The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, “This scope is so good, you can see my house all the way up on that hill”. The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing. “What’s so funny?” asks the clerk.

“I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house”, the man replies.

The clerk grabs the scope from the man, and looks at his house. Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, “Here are two bullets, I’ll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife’s head off and shoot the guy’s dick off.”

The man takes another look through the scope and says,
“You know what? I think I can do that with one shot!”

Whats the square root of 69?

ANSWER — EIGHT something