Encyclopedia of Humor

Members of the state assembly cannot be ticketed for speeding while the state assembly is in session.

Donkeys may not be kept in bathtubs.

Signs are required to be written in English.

You have the right to commit simple battery if provoked by “fighting” words.

No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday.

It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.

Acworth
All citizens must own a rake.

Atlanta
Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.

One man may not be on another man’s back.

Columbus
Can’t cut off a chicken’s head on Sunday.
It is illegal to carry a chicken by it’s feet down Broadway on Sunday.

Gainesville
Chicken must be eaten with the hands.

Jonesboro
It is illegal to say “Oh, Boy”

Kennesaw
Every head of household must possess a firearm of some kind.

Marietta
Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may spit from a truck.

St. Mary’s
No spitting on the sidewalk is permitted after dark.

Quitman
Cars are not to drive on sidewalks.

It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.

January 12, 1993

Rhett Jacobs, Democratic candidate for the South Carolina House and a man who listed “education” as his top priority, submitted a required campaign disclosure form in October, handwritten, on which he detailed expenses for “filling fee,” “campain work” and “litature.”

Thistles may not grow in one’s yard.
Baltimore

No person who is a “tramp” or “vagrant” shall loiter in any park at any time. They define tramp as a person who roves for begging purposes and a vagrant as an idle person who is able-bodied living without labor. It’s a $50 fine. I guess the tramp would have to beg for the money to pay the fine. -Park Rule 6

It’s illegal to take a lion to the movies.

It’s illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits.

It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday.

It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless. (1898)

Baltimore City
You may not curse inside the city limits.

Though you may spit on a city roadway, spitting on city sidewalks is prohibited.

Columbia
Though clotheslines are banned, clothes may be draped over a fence.

You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25′ satellite dish.

Ocean City
Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.

A law from the early 1900′s prohibits men from going topless on the Boardwalk. (Repealed)

Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.

It is considered an offense to shower naked.

You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.

It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road.

Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.

If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.

You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.

Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.

It is illegal to skateboard without a license.

A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.

Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.

Big Pine Key
It is illegal to molest a Key deer. If caught one will be fined or will have to go to jail.

Cape Coral
It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline.

It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street. This law is limited to only those who do not own the house. (Repealed 2000)

Daytona Beach
Sec. 10-56. While intoxicated, under influence of narcotics, prohibited. It shall be unlawful for any person to swim or bathe in that portion of the Atlantic Ocean within the corporate limits of the city when under the influence of intoxicating liquor or narcotic drugs to the extent that his or her normal faculties are impaired. (Code 1955, ? 28-64)

Sec. 18-2. Weeds, trash, etc., as a public nuisance; removal by property owner or by city at owner’s expense; notice and hearing; lien for expenses. (a) The existence of weeds, trash, undergrowth, brush, filth, garbage or other refuse on any lot, tract or parcel of land within the city which has caused the property to become, or which may reasonably cause the property to become infested, or inhabited by rodents, vermin or wild animals, or may furnish a breeding place for mosquitoes or threatens the public health, safety or welfare, or may reasonably cause disease or adversely affects and impairs the economic welfare of the adjacent property, is declared to constitute a public nuisance and is hereby prohibited.

Sec. 22-44. Storage, depositing prohibited. It shall be unlawful for any person, either as owner, occupant, lessee, agent, tenant, or otherwise, to store or deposit, or cause or permit to be stored or deposited, any abandoned, junked or discarded motor vehicle or motor vehicles upon any public or private property within the city. (Code 1955, ? 20-11)

The molestation of trash cans is banned.

Hialeah
Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.

Sec. 3-1. Bird sanctuary declared. (a) It is hereby declared that all territory embraced within the corporate limits of the municipality shall be a bird sanctuary. (b) It shall be unlawful for any person within the municipality to shoot, trap or in any manner kill, wound or maim any bird of any kind, or at any time to throw at any birds of any kind any missile with slingshots or any other weapon, or to disturb their eggs or their young or their nests. (Ord. No. 8-59, ?? 1, 2, 8-10-59)

Jupiter Inlet Colony Inlet

Key West
Chickens are considered a ‘protected species’.

Miami
Sec. 8-3. Bell or other warning device. No person shall operate a bicycle unless it is equipped with a bell or device capable of giving a signal audible for a distance of at least 100 feet, but no bicycle shall be equipped with, nor shall any person use upon a bicycle, any siren or whistle. (Code 1967, ? 8-3; Code 1980, ? 8-3)

It is illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.

Pensacola
A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.

It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel.

Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person.

Pinecrest
In order to operate a burglar alarm, a permit must be obtained. Sec. 12-23. Registration required; application; transferability; false statements. (a)All persons must complete and submit to the village an emergency contact registration form for their alarm if they operate or cause to be operated an alarm system in the village. A separate registration is required for each alarm system. Upon receipt of a completed registration form, the police department shall issue a numbered alarm sticker to the applicant to facilitate retrieval of registration information. (Ord. No. 97-17, ? 1, 10-14-97)

Sanford
Stage nudity is banned, with the exception of “bona fide” theatrical performances. Violating this ordinance results in a $100 fine.

Sarasota
You may not catch crabs.

If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.00.

Tampa Bay
It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.

February 1, 1993

The Associated Press reported that the village of Sodom, Conn., disappeared, like its biblical namesake.

Though it appears on maps, the AP writer interviewed residents of Sodom Road and the Sodom Corner intersection, both hallmarks of the village of Sodom, and discovered that everyone claims now to live in North Canaan.