Encyclopedia of Humor

There was a beautiful young blonde who was going to a soda machine and she arrived there just before a business man coming to quench his thirst. She opened her purse and put in 50 cents, studied the machine a little, pushed a Diet Coke selection, and out came a Diet Coke which she placed on a counter by the machine.

Then she reached in her purse again and pulled out a dollar and inserted it in the machine. Studying the machine carefully, she pushed the button for Coke Classic and out came a Coke Classic and 50 cents change.

She immediately took the 50 cents and put it in the machine, studied it for a moment and pushed the Mountain Dew button. Out came a Mountain Dew. As she was reaching into her purse again, the business man who had been waiting patiently for several minutes now spoke up.

“Excuse me Ms. but are you done yet?” She looked at him and indignantly replied: “Well Duhhh!, I’m still winning”

There’s this blond and this brunette. And they’re in an elevator. And this hot guy walks into the elevator, and the women are like “Woo-hoo, that guy is fine” and “Mmm…he’s got a nice butt”, and stuff like that.

Then they notice that he has dandruff.

When he gets off of the elevator, the women burst out laughing.

The brunette, giggles and says: “Oh, man, someone should give him head and shoulders.”

And the blond, confused, says: “Really? Well, how do you give someone shoulders?

What goes “errr, ohhh, errr, ohhh, errr, ohhh? A blonde at a
blinking red light!

What do you call a blonde that dies her hair Brown? Artificial intelligence!

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and asked the bartender…

Brunette: “I’ll have a B and C.” Bartender:”What is a B and C?”. Brunette: “Bourbon and Coke.”

Redhead: “And, I’ll have a G and T.” Bartender: “What’s a G and T?” Redhead: “Gin and tonic.”

Blonde: “I’ll have a
15.” Bartender: “What’s a 15?” Blonde: “7 and 7″