Invite a man to go shopping with you only if you need someone to carry your packages or drive.
Assure your boyfriend that every female movie star has had a boob job.
When your man asks you what’s wrong, say “Nothing.” However, when Oprah, Dr. Phil or Dr. Laura asks you, go into excruciating detail. Leave nothing out.
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1. You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping (and especially those bows) next year.
2. You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off.
3. When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them in your closet or in the bedroom of an adult child who has moved out.
4. You have a vinyl table cloth on your kitchen table.
5. Your stove is covered with aluminum foil. Read More…
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2000 For the period Dec 20, 1999 to Jan 10, 2000 we got fewer new viruses than in an average five-day period of 1999. (Vesselin Bontchev)
1999 It’s possible that we could see 200,000 viruses around Y2K. (Carey Nachenberg)
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In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you
are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis.
In another Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub.
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Tower: “Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o’clock, 6 miles!”
Delta 351: “Give us another hint! We have digital watches!”
“TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees.”
“Centre, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?”
“Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?”
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