Dave works hard at the plant and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, “Hey, Dave, how ya doin?”

His wife is puzzled and asks if he’s been to this club before. “Oh no,” says Dave. “He’s on my bowling team.”

When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he’d like his usual Budweiser. His wife is becoming uncomfortable and says, “You must come here a lot for that woman to know you drink Budweiser”.

“No, honey, she’s in the Ladies Bowling League. We share lanes with them.”

A stripper comes over to their table and throws her arms around Dave. “Hi Davey,” she says, “Want your usual table dance?”

Dave’s wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club. Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her and she starts screaming at him.

The cabby turns his head and says, “Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave.”!

There were three guys in a new bar that just openened and the bartender asked them what he should call his new bar.

One guy said, “just name it a pub.” Another said, “just name it the bar.” The thrid guy said, “name it Suzy’s Legs”.

The owner like that one so he called his bar Suzy’s Legs.

The next morning, this same guy and his dog were sitting in front of the bar waiting for it to open when a cop drove by and asked what he was doing?

He replied…nothing officer…”just waiting for Suzy’s Legs to open so I can get a drink!”

A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.�This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular culling of the weakest members.

In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells.�Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.

In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain
cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.

That’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers.

A Horse walks into a bar:
“Hey buddy,” says the bartender, “why the long face?”

2 people walk into a bar. The third one ducked.