Top Ten Reasons Why Britney Shaved Her Head

10: She forgot the number for 911.

9. No one had taken her photo in two and half seconds.

8. Someone told her white was the new black.She thought they meant supremacists.

7. Felt like she was missing out on stuff, y’know LIFE. Life as a bald person.

6. K-Fed was the one that always picked out the bowl.

5. Tired of everyone calling her a dumb blond.

4 Figured no one would notice her kewl new neck tattoo if it was covered up with stupid hair stuff.

3. For a million dollars.

2. So she could get beamed up on the spaceship that’s following the comet.

And the number 1 reason B.S. shaved her head.

1. Remembered to stop at her waist. Forgot which end to start on.