In the beginning, cats licked their ass until one day they stopped and farted, creating the universe. This is nothing but the truth. We cats know that all your base are now belong to us. The Cat is an immortal animal first invented by the Egyptians, who were in short supply of gods and rodent kills. Most attempts at domestication fail miserably,
as cats prefer ruling humans over being ruled by humans, but this hasn’t stopped man from trying. Cats will never be man’s best friend because cats don’t want friends.